March 31
Hello from Ukraine. We are inching closer to the midway point. We made some progress this week and we are waiting for our judge to issue a court date - hopefully he will tell us tomorrow. Yesterday was a mixture of visiting the kids and gathering documents. I sound like a broken record. There is just not a streamlined process over here. Every time we think we can check something off the list, there is another paper required, or a change has to be made, or a stamp/signature is missing. (Sort of a "2 steps forward, 1 step back" kind of place.). What a delight to take a "vacation" from our work here last night for a 3 hour dinner with the other family here right now working on an adoption. To speak only English, to confirm that we are experiencing the same challenges and that we are not, in fact, crazy was very encouraging. It is the process that is crazy. We were blessed by their good fellowship and generous spirit.
Tonight we had a little celebration at the "aunt's" apartment. She and T hosted us royally. We also met some of T's girlfriends. It was nice to see T so confident and lady-like. They worked most of the day preparing various Ukrainian dishes and they had lots of different breads and salads too. They even had dessert. These people are not wealthy, but they went all out tonight. We had good conversation and took some pictures. We even got to see an old photo of T when she was a baby. Too Cute!
Yes we are challenged on this rollercoaster ride and it can be maddening at times but then there are moments when a child grabs your hand, yells your name in delight or simple receives a bouquet of flowers for the second time in their many years of life and they are incredibly joyful. As with our visit in December, we are reliant on your prayers. We feel them and are grateful. There have been some saints that have come alongside us in an incredibly gracious way. I think of the young Ukrainian couple who have very little materially but are rich in faith and full of life and joy. She has acted as a pinch hitting translator for us and as and English teacher for one of our kids. They have put up with constant schedule changes and they know us only from one chance meeting at a church service. We will never forget their kindness and generosity.
We moved a few days ago from an apartment to a hotel to save money ($50 a night instead of $90 made sense). What we didn't expect was an upgrade in quality. A real shower with real heat and a jacuzzi tub; a full breakfast for about $3 made this decision a real positive for the week. This is one of those things you can only find out after having been on the ground here for a few weeks. We stumbled into this unmarked hotel near our apartment, looked at the room and took a chance. Bill's back loves to the end the day with the spa jets!
Tomorrow we should complete all the business that can be done before a court date is established. We hope to sign some papers and hop on the train for the 15 hour ride back to Kiev before 18 hours of flying time. We are desperate to see our kids (and we hate to leave our kids here). If all goes well we will be in LA by Thursday night. And if all goes well we will be back here for court a week or two later for a very short turnaround trip to make the court appearance. If you have any free airline miles.....
Too tired to write more. We are grateful for the progress and for all the support we receive.
Psalm 91 "He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, "He is my refuge and fortress, my God, in whom I trust."
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Good Vibrations
March 29th
Hello and hope you all are having fun at the pool/beach/whatever. We have been enjoying a balmy 50 degrees here the last few days. We almost didn't need our coats for a few hours. We have been spending time with T & S alot this weekend. Friday was a busy day getting all of T's medical forms completed. In the evening we went to S's orphanage and Skyped with some folks back home. Saturday was a full day. We started out at S's orphanage then went out to the Bazaar to do some shopping. We walked around & around looking at clothes. T & Rebecca held hands most of the way. This was initiated by T and it was the first time anything like that has happened. Next we ate pizza for lunch with T. & then T finally had her English lesson. She had a good first try. Later we tried to see a movie but we got the times wrong. (It is hard to read anything here) We went out for dessert with T and her Engligh teacher & her husband instead. Hopefully T is getting exposed to a better side of life with us. We think she likes it too. Sunday we went to see S again. This time we brought our computer and went on Google Earth. We showed T & S their cities here in Ukraine and then we "flew" over to the U.S. and showed them our home and their future schools, etc. It was pretty facinating. This afternoon we took T to the cinema. It was a Russian Teen movie. We didn't understand a word but the teenage angst was easy to get. The subtitles were of no use - they were in Ukrainian! Afterwards, T suggested that we go out to the amusement park, just the 3 of us - without a translator. We agreed and we were able to communicate enough to have a pleasant evening. We taught each other words, went on rides, and ate dinner at a restaurant. We feel that we have been making a good connection with T! More hand holding took place at the park. I hope we made some good memories and laid a good foundation.
Proverbs 22:6 "Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it."
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Anyone good with a Crystal Ball?
March 24
We have been tardy in writing to all of you. Since we last wrote on this blog we have been spending many hours with our Ukrainian kids, as well as filling out documents, traveling in taxis, and going to meetings. Think of this time here as a business trip, and not a vacation.
Sunday we saw our little guy in the morning, and then later in the evening, we attended a Ukrainian church service. The Barkers were also there and set up a sound system for a translator to tell us what was said. (Thank you Jane & Richard) We could not understand everything, but it still felt good to be in church and worship and pray with other believers. We will do it again this Sunday. After that service, we met with a woman who is willing to teach our “girl” some basic English. We are thrilled to get her started this week.
Monday we met with the assistant inspector and also her boss, the director of Child’s Services. Our girl was also there. She told them all that she wants to come to America and make something of herself. We hope that this is true. Later we returned to the Asst.’s office and our girl wrote out a statement telling how she wants to be adopted by us and she wants to go to America. We need the approval of so many people in this city and in the city where our little guy is living. Double paperwork is becoming normal & necessary. We also found out that our girl does not attend school regularly. The Director told her that she needs to go to school or he won’t let her go to America.
Tuesday was a frustrating day of meetings and cancelled meetings – not a very productive day. We did end our day with a nice dessert with a translator friend of ours who has come with the orphans to the U.S. several times. We enjoyed catching up with her, and telling about our adoption process.
Wednesday morning we woke up to a snow storm. Just the day before our taxi driver was declaring that “Spring is here.” (So much for that!) Also that morning, our girl got her Ukrainian Passport. Here it has the same meaning as a U.S. teenager getting their driver’s license. She was so happy. She was also supposed to go to get a physical as required by adoption law. The timing was not right, and so she plans on going on Thurs. Later in the afternoon, we went to our girl’s school - College #8 - to get paperwork, but we ended up having an impromptu meeting with the Assistant Director of the College. He was so kind and talked with us and insisted on sharing the gifts we had given him. In addition to the chocolates and cognac we had given him, he added Ukrainian cookies, coffee and tea. It sure was different literally toasting and drinking cognac in the middle of the afternoon at school with the faculty!!! He really was insistent. We left there warmed by his hospitality (and of course the cognac). We planned on meeting our girl in the evening at 6:00 for her first English lesson, but she cancelled on us at the last minute. It turns out that teens like to celebrate here when they get their passport, and she went out with her friends.
Thursday was disappointing because our girl did not go to the physical. We tried to meet up with her, but she was not at home. Instead, we were able to talk to her “Aunt” who she lives with. We took the Aunt out to breakfast, and with the help of our translator, we learned a lot more about our girl’s present and past. (The good, the bad and the ordinary.) We feel strongly that we need to know as much as possible about our kids, so we can do our best to help them. Later on we visited our little guy and played games with him and with another little girl who will be adopted later by another family. Our little guy signed a paper telling the orphanage director that he also wants to be adopted by us. Then we did more filing of paperwork in his city. Finally at 4:00pm, after waiting three days, we were invited to talk with the Assistant Mayor, and the Asst. Inspector. We had a pleasant and brief chat with them. The Asst. Mayor knew of us and our attempt to adopt back in Dec. She seemed cautiously optimistic about our adopting the older sister. I guess we passed, because she wished us luck and was kind to us. We ate dinner at our favorite restaurant, Reflections.
If all goes well, the paperwork should be completed and in Kiev for approval by the State Department of Adoptions (SDA) by Monday. So far the process is moving steadily forward for both children. We need more time with the children, particularly the older girl, in order to build relationships and better understand what motivates her and to know what her goals are for the future. Please pray for these children and for clarity about God’s will for each of them in this process. As we learn more of the unsavory details of these children’s very sad histories it is tempting to make quick and easy black and white judgments. We need to resist these hasty judgments as we never have the complete perspective.
Matthew 7: 1-5 “Do not judge or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, “Let me take the speck out of your eye”, when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.”
We have been tardy in writing to all of you. Since we last wrote on this blog we have been spending many hours with our Ukrainian kids, as well as filling out documents, traveling in taxis, and going to meetings. Think of this time here as a business trip, and not a vacation.
Sunday we saw our little guy in the morning, and then later in the evening, we attended a Ukrainian church service. The Barkers were also there and set up a sound system for a translator to tell us what was said. (Thank you Jane & Richard) We could not understand everything, but it still felt good to be in church and worship and pray with other believers. We will do it again this Sunday. After that service, we met with a woman who is willing to teach our “girl” some basic English. We are thrilled to get her started this week.
Monday we met with the assistant inspector and also her boss, the director of Child’s Services. Our girl was also there. She told them all that she wants to come to America and make something of herself. We hope that this is true. Later we returned to the Asst.’s office and our girl wrote out a statement telling how she wants to be adopted by us and she wants to go to America. We need the approval of so many people in this city and in the city where our little guy is living. Double paperwork is becoming normal & necessary. We also found out that our girl does not attend school regularly. The Director told her that she needs to go to school or he won’t let her go to America.
Tuesday was a frustrating day of meetings and cancelled meetings – not a very productive day. We did end our day with a nice dessert with a translator friend of ours who has come with the orphans to the U.S. several times. We enjoyed catching up with her, and telling about our adoption process.
Wednesday morning we woke up to a snow storm. Just the day before our taxi driver was declaring that “Spring is here.” (So much for that!) Also that morning, our girl got her Ukrainian Passport. Here it has the same meaning as a U.S. teenager getting their driver’s license. She was so happy. She was also supposed to go to get a physical as required by adoption law. The timing was not right, and so she plans on going on Thurs. Later in the afternoon, we went to our girl’s school - College #8 - to get paperwork, but we ended up having an impromptu meeting with the Assistant Director of the College. He was so kind and talked with us and insisted on sharing the gifts we had given him. In addition to the chocolates and cognac we had given him, he added Ukrainian cookies, coffee and tea. It sure was different literally toasting and drinking cognac in the middle of the afternoon at school with the faculty!!! He really was insistent. We left there warmed by his hospitality (and of course the cognac). We planned on meeting our girl in the evening at 6:00 for her first English lesson, but she cancelled on us at the last minute. It turns out that teens like to celebrate here when they get their passport, and she went out with her friends.
Thursday was disappointing because our girl did not go to the physical. We tried to meet up with her, but she was not at home. Instead, we were able to talk to her “Aunt” who she lives with. We took the Aunt out to breakfast, and with the help of our translator, we learned a lot more about our girl’s present and past. (The good, the bad and the ordinary.) We feel strongly that we need to know as much as possible about our kids, so we can do our best to help them. Later on we visited our little guy and played games with him and with another little girl who will be adopted later by another family. Our little guy signed a paper telling the orphanage director that he also wants to be adopted by us. Then we did more filing of paperwork in his city. Finally at 4:00pm, after waiting three days, we were invited to talk with the Assistant Mayor, and the Asst. Inspector. We had a pleasant and brief chat with them. The Asst. Mayor knew of us and our attempt to adopt back in Dec. She seemed cautiously optimistic about our adopting the older sister. I guess we passed, because she wished us luck and was kind to us. We ate dinner at our favorite restaurant, Reflections.
If all goes well, the paperwork should be completed and in Kiev for approval by the State Department of Adoptions (SDA) by Monday. So far the process is moving steadily forward for both children. We need more time with the children, particularly the older girl, in order to build relationships and better understand what motivates her and to know what her goals are for the future. Please pray for these children and for clarity about God’s will for each of them in this process. As we learn more of the unsavory details of these children’s very sad histories it is tempting to make quick and easy black and white judgments. We need to resist these hasty judgments as we never have the complete perspective.
Matthew 7: 1-5 “Do not judge or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, “Let me take the speck out of your eye”, when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.”
Saturday, March 21, 2009
A Cold Spring Morning Surprise
As is often the case here, things changed without any notice, but sometimes they change for the better. Today was one of those days. As we noted in an earlier post, we had been told we would not be able to see our little guy's sister (lets call her T) until Monday. Unbeknownst to us, she expressed an interest in seeing us and her brother (lets call him S) today despite being ill. So we piled into our taxi and headed to T's aunt's apartment to see her for the first time since December. She was very shy at first but smiled and greeted us. We drove the 30 or so minutes to the orphanage where T and S hugged and clearly shared some genuine affection for one another. We shared some photos from the family's visit to the orphanage last December, played a bit with S and some other children, but too soon it was time to go. We stopped for lunch on the way back, shared some stories with one another about travel, different cultures, languages and enjoyed pancakes, coffee and hot melted chocolate together. T and Bill discovered that they know about the same number of words in one another's languages (between one and three). When we returned to T's aunt's home to drop T off, she gave us both warm hugs. she expressed (through our interpreter) her apologies for the way our December visit had gone (when T was under the supervision of the shelter director). It was a delightul surprise and a good first encounter. We hope and pray we can build upon this interaction.
Before we left the U.S., we had a conversation with another family that has been over here. We agreed the trip would not "fail" because of a lack of prayer. We believe there are literally hundreds of people praying for God's will for these children during this trip. What we can tell you, dear friends and family, is that these first 72 hours feel very different from our first trip. For example we were in-and-out of Kiev with everything accomplished in 8 hours. (last trip was almost 72 hours.) We felt alone and unsupported last trip: as a simple example, this trip we had three people just helping us to buy groceries! Please continue your prayers as we are grateful to God for His provision so far, and we pray that our actions would be pleasing to Him, that His will would be done and that any success or glory that results from this trip would be given to Him and Him alone. Our interest is in being obedient regardless of whether the outcome of that obedience is one we can understand fully now.
Oswald Chambers' devotions are often so helpful we offer his recent entry here in its entirety as an encouragement to all.
Abraham's Life of Faith
"He went out, not knowing where he was going" (Hebrews 11:8). In the Old Testament, a person's relationship with God was seen by the degree of separation in that person's life. This separation is exhibited in the life of Abraham by his separation from his country and his family. When we think of separation today, we do not mean to be literally separated from those family members who do not have a personal relationship with God, but to be separated mentally and morally from their viewpoints. This is what Jesus was referring to in Luke 14:26.
Living a life of faith means never knowing where you are being led. But it does mean loving and knowing the One who is leading. It is literally a life of faith, not of understanding and reason-a life of knowing Him who calls us to go. Faith is rooted in the knowledge of a Person, and one of the bigger traps we fall into is the belief that if we have faith, God will surely lead us to success in this world.
The final stage in the life of faith is the attainment of character, and we encounter many changes in the process. We feel the presence of God around us when we pray, yet we are only momentarily changed. We tend to keep going back to our everyday ways and the glory vanishes. A life of faith is not a life of one glorious mountaintop experience after another, like soaring on eagles' wings, but is a life of day in and day out consistency; a life of walking without fainting (see Isaiah 40:31). It is not even a question of the holiness of sanctification, but of something which comes much farther down the road. It is a faith that has been tried and proved and has withstood the test. Abraham is not a type or an example of the holiness of sanctification, but a type of the life of faith- a faith, tested and true, built on the true God. "Abraham believed God..." (Romans 4:3).
May it be so with each of us.
Before we left the U.S., we had a conversation with another family that has been over here. We agreed the trip would not "fail" because of a lack of prayer. We believe there are literally hundreds of people praying for God's will for these children during this trip. What we can tell you, dear friends and family, is that these first 72 hours feel very different from our first trip. For example we were in-and-out of Kiev with everything accomplished in 8 hours. (last trip was almost 72 hours.) We felt alone and unsupported last trip: as a simple example, this trip we had three people just helping us to buy groceries! Please continue your prayers as we are grateful to God for His provision so far, and we pray that our actions would be pleasing to Him, that His will would be done and that any success or glory that results from this trip would be given to Him and Him alone. Our interest is in being obedient regardless of whether the outcome of that obedience is one we can understand fully now.
Oswald Chambers' devotions are often so helpful we offer his recent entry here in its entirety as an encouragement to all.
Abraham's Life of Faith
"He went out, not knowing where he was going" (Hebrews 11:8). In the Old Testament, a person's relationship with God was seen by the degree of separation in that person's life. This separation is exhibited in the life of Abraham by his separation from his country and his family. When we think of separation today, we do not mean to be literally separated from those family members who do not have a personal relationship with God, but to be separated mentally and morally from their viewpoints. This is what Jesus was referring to in Luke 14:26.
Living a life of faith means never knowing where you are being led. But it does mean loving and knowing the One who is leading. It is literally a life of faith, not of understanding and reason-a life of knowing Him who calls us to go. Faith is rooted in the knowledge of a Person, and one of the bigger traps we fall into is the belief that if we have faith, God will surely lead us to success in this world.
The final stage in the life of faith is the attainment of character, and we encounter many changes in the process. We feel the presence of God around us when we pray, yet we are only momentarily changed. We tend to keep going back to our everyday ways and the glory vanishes. A life of faith is not a life of one glorious mountaintop experience after another, like soaring on eagles' wings, but is a life of day in and day out consistency; a life of walking without fainting (see Isaiah 40:31). It is not even a question of the holiness of sanctification, but of something which comes much farther down the road. It is a faith that has been tried and proved and has withstood the test. Abraham is not a type or an example of the holiness of sanctification, but a type of the life of faith- a faith, tested and true, built on the true God. "Abraham believed God..." (Romans 4:3).
May it be so with each of us.
Friday, March 20, 2009
We're Back!!!
March 19, 2009
WE’RE BACK!!! Can you believe it? We didn’t think this would happen for a long while. Konstantine, our adoption facilitator, worked his magic once again and he got us a “continuance.” That means we are starting over – as if December didn’t happen (We think) We, Bill & Rebecca only, got on a plane early Wednesday morning out of LAX and flew to NY. Then we got on another flight and landed in Kiev Thursday morning. Boy how time flies. We are grateful for smooth travel, all our luggage is here, Bill’s back is doing ok after the long flights, easy customs experience, quick contact with our driver at the airport and it is probably 15 degrees warmer than our last arrival (today it is in the high 30’s we think).
We are hoping to get in & out of the State Department of Adoptions (SDA) today, Thursday the 19th, and head to the region on the train tonight. This may or may not happen. The SDA could take an hour or a day to provide us the referral paperwork we need and even if we get it today, train tickets are hard to come by, so we will know tonight. Most likely we will need to spend the night in Kiev. Many of you are wondering what has happened to us over the last 2 months. Well here is the condensed version:
We returned to the states at the end of Dec. ’08 without any success of adoption. It was a sad time for our family. Bill worked diligently trying to get our little guy here on a medical visa, but that also was not progressing. We continued to look at every option we could, and prayed constantly for guidance and understanding. Then, about 3 weeks ago, one of the facilitators in the region was finally able to talk to our little guy’s sister – alone. After they talked, the sister changed her mind and she decided she would consider coming to the U.S. with her brother. We were surprised, shocked, concerned, elated and felt the full range of these emotions simultaneously. We got on the phone and talked to all parties involved and decided to give her a chance. We spoke to her and we felt that she was sincere. We decided to step out in faith and invite her to consent to being adopted by us. She accepted and we started the formal paperwork to make that happen. And here we are...back in Ukraine, back in Kiev at O’Brien’s Irish Pub, listening to Motown, classic rock and eating fish and chips and steak. (If only we were here two days ago for the biggest Irish party in town!!)
Flash forward:
Now we are writing on Friday Night at 10:30p.m. Chernitvsi time. (1:30p.m. L.A time -9 hour time difference) We were able to get in & out of the SDA yesterday afternoon, and also get a room on the train. We travelled all night and arrived here in the region at 9:30am. We were met by our facilitator, and a taxi whisked us to our apartment. It is comfortable and and they gave us one hour to clean up before they took us to our appointment at the inspector’s office. There we had to formally ask permission to go and see the kids. We were successfully approved and made our first supervised visit to the Child’s House orphanage. While there we got to see our little guy and get reacquainted, as well as give hugs to an older girl at the orphanage that another family hopes to adopt. We wanted to also see the sister later on, but she is in another area and we need to get permission from a different inspector. Unfortunately, both the 2nd inspector and the sister are sick. We’ll have to wait to see them till Monday but she is aware we are in town. We returned to town, purchased a wireless modem and some local internet time, groceries and made our first video skype call with the kids. Thanks to all of you (you know who you are) who supported us in understanding this technology which lets us stay in touch with the three kids back home. It is wonderful! To round out our day, we had a nice dinner with the Barkers at the German restaurant called, Haus, here in town. It was great to see all of them (7 in all) and see familiar faces and talk about our common experiences. They are also in the process of adopting 3 boys. Successfully approved and made our first supervised visit to the young child’s orphanage. The first day of Spring in Chernivitsi included rain, snow and freezing rain and even a little sun!! We are going to fall over asleep now. Travelling is exciting and exhausting.
We are hoping to get in & out of the State Department of Adoptions (SDA) today, Thursday the 19th, and head to the region on the train tonight. This may or may not happen. The SDA could take an hour or a day to provide us the referral paperwork we need and even if we get it today, train tickets are hard to come by, so we will know tonight. Most likely we will need to spend the night in Kiev. Many of you are wondering what has happened to us over the last 2 months. Well here is the condensed version:
We returned to the states at the end of Dec. ’08 without any success of adoption. It was a sad time for our family. Bill worked diligently trying to get our little guy here on a medical visa, but that also was not progressing. We continued to look at every option we could, and prayed constantly for guidance and understanding. Then, about 3 weeks ago, one of the facilitators in the region was finally able to talk to our little guy’s sister – alone. After they talked, the sister changed her mind and she decided she would consider coming to the U.S. with her brother. We were surprised, shocked, concerned, elated and felt the full range of these emotions simultaneously. We got on the phone and talked to all parties involved and decided to give her a chance. We spoke to her and we felt that she was sincere. We decided to step out in faith and invite her to consent to being adopted by us. She accepted and we started the formal paperwork to make that happen. And here we are...back in Ukraine, back in Kiev at O’Brien’s Irish Pub, listening to Motown, classic rock and eating fish and chips and steak. (If only we were here two days ago for the biggest Irish party in town!!)
Flash forward:
Now we are writing on Friday Night at 10:30p.m. Chernitvsi time. (1:30p.m. L.A time -9 hour time difference) We were able to get in & out of the SDA yesterday afternoon, and also get a room on the train. We travelled all night and arrived here in the region at 9:30am. We were met by our facilitator, and a taxi whisked us to our apartment. It is comfortable and and they gave us one hour to clean up before they took us to our appointment at the inspector’s office. There we had to formally ask permission to go and see the kids. We were successfully approved and made our first supervised visit to the Child’s House orphanage. While there we got to see our little guy and get reacquainted, as well as give hugs to an older girl at the orphanage that another family hopes to adopt. We wanted to also see the sister later on, but she is in another area and we need to get permission from a different inspector. Unfortunately, both the 2nd inspector and the sister are sick. We’ll have to wait to see them till Monday but she is aware we are in town. We returned to town, purchased a wireless modem and some local internet time, groceries and made our first video skype call with the kids. Thanks to all of you (you know who you are) who supported us in understanding this technology which lets us stay in touch with the three kids back home. It is wonderful! To round out our day, we had a nice dinner with the Barkers at the German restaurant called, Haus, here in town. It was great to see all of them (7 in all) and see familiar faces and talk about our common experiences. They are also in the process of adopting 3 boys. Successfully approved and made our first supervised visit to the young child’s orphanage. The first day of Spring in Chernivitsi included rain, snow and freezing rain and even a little sun!! We are going to fall over asleep now. Travelling is exciting and exhausting.
Train
Taxi
Apartment
Bill and Rebecca
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